[Author's PoV]

"It's never your fault. It's nobody's fault."

"I'm so sorry it takes so long for you to hear that."

It was the first thing that came to his mind when his heat was over and he finally could take control over his body and mind again. It was Joong's voice. Joong, who is still sleeping peacefully beside him. It was his secret but Dunk loved to see Joong in his sleep, there was such a contentment in his heart whenever he saw his boyfriend was having a good sleep. It felt like he contributed something to make him finally have a little better life.

This morning too, Dunk takes a lot of time just to observe how Joong is sleeping while resting his hand on his waist, protectively .

Dunk remembers everything ; he remembers every touch, every kiss, every longing eyes they gave to each other. He remembers that they became one as a mate several days ago.

He closes his eyes, not knowing how to feel anymore.

The guilt he has for his twin brother is so big but he can't deny the fact that his love for Joong Archen is much bigger. And to feel that kind of love, he feels another wave of guiltiness.

"Why do you feel so depressed, this is only five in the morning, Dunk?"

Dunk feels a little bit shocked when the hand on his waist pulls him closer and tighter, when he looks up from his waist he sees Joong's brown eyes look at him straight in the eyes. He wakes up already.

"I don't know about you, but now I can feel you. Whatever you feel, I can feel it." Joong tries to explain but Dunk doesn't need that explanation because he can also feel the same way. The outcome of their mating, now they can feel each other's feelings. This makes it harder to hide things from Joong.

Joong starts to feel anxious in front of him, Dunk can feel that.

"Can we talk?" He asks softly, almost pleadingly to Dunk. "I can feel the turmoil inside you, but i'm still have no idea why you feel this much."

There is no chance of lying to him again with such bullshit like wanting to break up because he had fallen out of love with him. Joong can feel how much love Dunk has for him right now and it scares him. Dunk closes their gap and buries his face on his boyfriend's chest, he takes a deep breathe to inhale how their pheromones are already mix-up in the air.

There is no way back anymore.

Joong can sense Dunk's restlessness and chooses not to corner him anymore, at least this time, when his omega is very much exhausted and he is sure that his body is giving him a lot of pain as an aftermath of having five days straight sex. A mindblowing one, to be added. He chooses to calm him with his touch and kisses his head softly.

"We need to go." Dunk said something while still burying his face in Joong's chest, he feels so much safe like this. "Before my parents catch us together, we need to go, because they will separate us again."

Joong nods, at least one question is answered.

Dunk's parents were indeed the one who wanted them to be separated from each other. It's never really Dunk's intention at the beginning. Joong breathes more easily after knowing this.

They remain still for as long as they can, with Joong holding Dunk so tightly and keep whispering how much he loves him. Their body's proportions aren't that much different but at times like this, Dunk always feel so small in Joong's embrace.

He wants to stay longer but something deep inside him says that they need to move today. He pulls out from the embrace and once again looks at his boyfriend's eyes.

"Where should we go?" Joong asks softly.

"I know a place." Dunk smiles so prettily and it's been awhile for Joong to see that smile he misses so much.

When Dunk lived here, he oftenly did some volunteer activities with his college community, his parents didn't know this. One day he made friends with a guy who has a small yet comfortable homestay area near the Halensee lake, the beautiful lake not too far from Berlin. They were pretty much close and Dunk oftenly went to his homestay whenever he felt like wanting to paint because the lake's view was so beautiful.

That will be the place Joong and Dunk will go today.

Joong never once let out of Dunk's hand. They go to the place that only Dunk knows with using a public transportation because Dunk insisted that they must left their rented car in the hotel so it won't be easier for someone to track where they go.

They reach there when it's lunch time. Dunk's friend, who is an omega named Barry, is shocked when he sees his old friend is knocking on his door with an alpha holding his hand so tight. Joong is sure that he notices a lot of bite marks on Dunk's neck but he didn't ask any questions, he only smiled at the sight of Dunk and his alpha. Dunk explains to him that he wants to stay for a while on Barry's homestay with his boyfriend, Joong can't contain his smile when he hears how Dunk introduces him to his friend, and his friend gladly accepts them. After bringing them to the dining area to have their lunch, Barry gives them their homestay's key. He is so kind, he even gives them the best spot, larger and a secluded one near the lake, pretty much far from other's homestay's building.

He leaves them with a knowing smile and Joong can't help but want to pinch Dunk's cheeks because he looks so cute while blushing.

"You really need to bite me everywhere, huh?" His complaint is the first thing Joong hears once Barry is leaving them alone. Joong laughs a little bit.

"You moan prettily whenever I bite you, so.." Joong shrugs his shoulders while smirking and his pretty boyfriend's cheeks are getting more red than before.

Dunk walks toward the balcony and stays there to run away from Joong's beastly eyes. He looks at the lake and smiles at how peaceful it is. He wants to live in a place like this in the future, with Joong by his side.

The man from his imagination walks toward him and hugs him from behind, he rests his chin on his shoulder and Dunk closes his eyes. He tries to cherish the moment he has with Joong because he is so afraid that someone will take that later.

"Dunk, can we talk?" Joong once again asks and Dunk has no choice but to tell him everything. Even though it will hurt him so badly, even though he isn't sure how Joong will react with the story of their tragic pasts that was intertwined. But Dunk will share it because he can't handle it by himself. The last time he thought he could handle it on his own, he made two of them live miserably. Seeing Joong in that hospital room, looking pale and sick, unable to move, made the ghosts from the past awake once again for Dunk.

So, maybe, he can tell Joong the story of their pasts.

Because he can't go on with this life without Joong anymore, not only because they were mating, but because Joong assured him, he said that Dunk doesn't need to bear all the pain alone.

"Lean on me more, I'm your alpha. You can rest your heart with me. Don't take all the burden by yourself, share it with me. I'm gonna be with you in every step you take."

Dunk never knew that all this time, he was waiting for someone to say those words to him.

And he is glad that Joong was the one who finally told him things he wanted to hear the most.

"Joong." Dunk looks up to see Joong's beautiful eyes. "Do you believe me if i say that we already met long before we met at Pond and Phuwin's place?"

There is a confusion in his eyes and Dunk understands it. Joong releases his hug and faces Dunk at that balcony. "What?"

"Have you ever considered that maybe there is always a reason behind your incapability of smelling omegas and your sleeping problem?" Dunk asks again and he can feel how Joong's feeling right now.

He is confused, but also... scared . He is pretty much shaken and Dunk is afraid Joong will break in front of him.

Joong takes a step back and this time, Dunk is the one who holds his hand.

"Did we meet before? Am I the reason for your suffering in the past?"

Dunk looks at him without saying anything, the feeling of scared he resonates right now because he is afraid that he was the one who hurted Dunk in the past? How pure is his heart? He didn't even think about himself at the moment.

Joong is panicked right now, his beautiful eyes lost focus, but Dunk was determined to tell him this. He asked for this, even though it hurts him to make Joong understand this way. But it is better to just show him everything, than tell him with his word. Because right now, they have the ability not only to feel each other's feelings, but to show each other's memory.

Because when they were having sex Joong was unconsciously showing Dunk how his life was when Dunk walked away from it. Dunk was seeing Joong sleepless nights, he was also seeing how Joong desperately searched for him in every second of his life. That was the moment he realized, they both ruined each other's life with their separation.

And it was also the moment he realized he can show him his memories together with how he feels about it, so he can understand it way better than any words spoken between them.

Dunk touches his boyfriend's cheeks softly, making him look at his eyes one more time. When those brown eyes meet his, Dunk opens his pandora box called their long lost memories and shows it to Joong.

And Joong's world starts to stop spinning at that moment.

The tree house.

"So we both are the forgotten sons from our parents."

"Joong, my name is Joong Archen."

"My name is Dunk Natachai."

"Whenever you want to cry, you can call me. Don't cry alone in this dark and empty place. I can go to your place if you called, as long as you open the door for me. I will accompany you."

The amusement park.

"Don't touch what's mine!"

"You already have our parents, don't take my friend too!"

"This needs to be fixed, we will go to the amusement park!"

The dark basement.

"Ha, the omega's one is the bravest one."

"But I won't kill you today, it will be too easy. I will kill you after ten days. I need to see your desperate expression when I lock you up long enough until you all lose your mind and beg me."

"Instead of your life, I will make you a defective omega. I have something in my bag right now to ruin the future of a beautiful omega like you. You won't have your heat, so you can't get pregnant. Your family won't have any descendants and I'm winning perfectly."

"I don't care about any of it, if you can give me a medicine that can save Joong, I don't mind becoming a defective omega."

"KILL ME! JUST KILL ME! Release them, please... kill me."

"Since I already crushed your brother's leg, now you are the only one who can escape here."

"Choose."

"DUNK!!! HE WILL KILL ALL OF US IF YOU DON'T SAY SOMETHING!!!"

"Little brother. You can't choose between me and Joong and I know it, and it's not your fault. So I will be the one who chooses for you. Please, go with Joong and live for me. Please... as I had so many sins to you, I made you suffer a lot, I'm the one who didn't deserve to be alive. I don't want to see you die here. Please, I beg you, my little brother. Please say my name that will be left here and save your life."

"Dao."

The forest.

"It will be ok, Nong. After this road, we are gonna see our family. Right after this forest end, they are there waiting for us."

"Phi, my head is so hurt, everything burned, I feel like dying. I won't make it."

"Phi, if you survive this. Please remember me. Just by the thoughts that you will always remember me make me feel like I'm no longer alone in this world. I will meet you on the other side of this world."

The first thing he does when Dunk finally shows Joong all of his memories is hugging him tight. Joong is breathless and his body is trembling hard. He is showing the sign of someone who just suffered from a panic attack. Dunk taps his back repeatedly while trying to stop himself from crying because showing Joong all of this is so painful for him too.

In his hold, he feels like he is hugging the little Joong he held so dear in that dark basement. A little kid who is helpless and weak, but Joong didn't grow up as a weak alpha. He is way more stronger than his old self, Dunk believes in that.

"I'm sorry." Joong who still trembles in his embrace is saying sorry again and again, Dunk knows how he is feeling right now. He is so confused, almost can't believe what he just saw, and is very much broken . He feels so much guilt and Dunk can understand his feeling because he feels the same way too.

"It's never your fault. It's nobody's fault."

Dunk says those words again, he gives them back to Joong. The one who says it.

Joong pulls out from the hug and looks at his boyfriend's eyes.

"Now you know, Joong. Now you know how much I love you." Dunk says at the end while trying to smile. His eyes are already full of tears. "That's the only thing that is true."

Joong can't help but also cry when he hears this declaration one more time. Now it feels more than a love confession, it has more deep and abiding meaning.

Their deep and abiding love for each other is something that bonds them together in their forgotten past, their present, and also their future.

Because they love each other so much, they will try to face everything, together.

"I love you Dunk, for as long as I'm breathing." Joong says at the end.

The past is haunting them, the present is too fragile and unpredictable, and the future has so much mystery. But as long as they keep holding each other's hand, they think they can move forward in this life. They will live while remembering the one who has already gone. And also, they will live while bearing the guilt for everyone who was hurted by the past.

Even though they both know, it wasn't their fault.

With the background of Halensee lake, in their solitude, one more time, they become one . This time, it's not their inner alpha and omega. It's not because of their sexual desire towards each other, but because they finally understand why they feel so connected . They finally understand why in the short time they can feel so much love for each other.

Because it's not a short time for them. It's their lifetime to know each other and to love each other.

The Little Joong and Little Dunk who suffered much in their childhood days finally reunite again as an adult who still love each other so much and become each other's safe place.

Every puzzle piece is now connected.

The reason why Joong's trouble sleeping can only be cured by Dunk's presence, the reason why Dunk couldn't face heat for so long but the appearance of Joong in his life again was the one which could trigger it, and the reason why Joong can only smell Dunk's omega pheromone.

Their suffering was only the way for them to finally recognize and meet each other once again even though they both didn't remember their past.

"Joong."

"Hmmm?"

"If I need to restart my life and experience all of this again just to meet you, I think I will still choose this life."

Joong shakes his head. "If I had a chance to restart this life, I will make sure to walk away from that dark basement with both of you and Dao in my hand."

Dunk smiles.

"Dao is never gone, he will live here forever." Joong touches Dunk's chest. "He will live as long as the people that are still breathing, remember him."

***

"What should we do now, Joong?"

It's already late at night and both Joong and Dunk just finished their another round of making love, this time with both of them present as the one who takes control of their body. With a mind as clear as the night sky outside. They just lay bare naked in their bed, legs intertwined with each other, with Dunk laying on Joong chest, listening to his heartbeat and the younger one playing with his boyfriend's stray hairs that feel so soft in his fingers.

When Dunk took his shower this evening, Joong braced himself to turn on his cellphone just to see a bunch of messages from so many people. His parents, who never contacted him first, are on the list. Then the random number he assumed was Dunk's parents number. And Pond.

Everyone is going crazy right now because the sons of Aydin and Boonprasert's family are missing, the two people who can't be together are missing together. How perfect. But he didn't expect, Dunk's parents and his parents are in this country, nope- in this city. They are joint hands to find them, they are all looking for them, with Pond and Phuwin as their hostage. He knew this when he opened Pond's message that explained everything to him.

He is just too afraid to open his parents and Dunk parents' messages.

He turned it off again after reading Pond's message. Pond's message is clear enough for him to understand about the situation outside.

"It's a good thing you threw away my phone, i didn't need to feel anxious whenever i touch my phone." Dunk laughs on his chest.

"I'm sorry for that, I was too rough on you." Joong acknowledges that he didn't need to go that far to Dunk but he was so angry he couldn't control himself when he heard those lies from his boyfriend's mouth.

"I'm sorry for telling lies and wanting to break up with you."

Ugh.

Nightmare.

Joong doesn't want to remember that.

"I'm sorry for leaving you alone and not giving you any explanations, I thought I could handle it by myself." Dunk says sorry once again, but Joong doesn't like his tone of voice. He sounds so sad.

Joong straightens up his back and lifts Dunk's body so now he is sitting on his laps with his eyes facing him. He winces a little when he can feel their most sensitive parts are touching each other again.

"We both made our mistake, I forgive you and you... do you forgive me, babe?" Joong raises his eyebrows to ask.

Dunk nods. "I made a lot of mistakes, of course I forgive you."

"Ok, now between us, no more feeling sorry towards each other, ok?" Joong shows him his little finger for Dunk to hook it with his. Why does this look so innocent when their cocks are touching each other and starting to wake up again just from a soft touch?

"Ok." Dunk hooks his little finger with Joong's and smiles.

Joong is enchanted by his boyfriend's blinding smile and wants to kiss him again but Dunk moves away. "No, no. If you kiss me again we will end up doing that again. Now it's not the time, use your brain, we have a serious problem out there."

Joong pouts his lips, looks like a little kid who wants to throw a tantrum because his parents don't give him a toy he wants. "Can we think about it tomorrow? One more round please?"

Dunk shakes his head firmly. "You know my parents, they can find this place anytime soon, and now your parents are also joining them to search us. That's bad, your parents work in the technology industry right? Can they hack this place's front door CCTV? We will be doomed. I don't want to be found by them while you are knotting me deep inside. My mother will have a cardiac arrest!"

Joong wants to laugh because his boyfriend is so damn cute. His mind is so wild, it makes him want to tease him more.

"That's a good idea."

"What?" Dunk almost wants to throw a hand to his boyfriend. How can to be found by parents while having a sex is a good idea?

"Not that part." Dunk was definitely voicing out his mind. "What if... us bringing them grandchildren can solve our problem. It's also their blood and flesh, they won't separate us any more."

Dunk opens his mouth in shock. "How can your mind work like a pathetic soap opera storyline?"

"What? It can be our solution, baby."

Dunk shakes his head firmly, again . "No! I don't want to give birth to your children if we are in this condition. What if our parents will ask me to abort it? What if they will throw away my children if I ever give birth to them."

The alpha smirks a little and Dunk doesn't like the smug face he is showing to him right now. "Babe, you sure you aren't pregnant right now?"

Oh shit.

Suddenly Dunk feels so shy and the heat starts spreading from the lower part of his stomach.

"Joong." Dunk's tone of voice is getting more serious and Joong knows that his boyfriend is starting to get annoyed (but also shy) at the moment.

"Ok, we have many times to talk about the babies. We are in serious conversation right now. Joong, think. What should we do? Hmmm."

Dunk looks at Joong one more time while trying so hard not to burst into laughter. Joong's serious face and voice don't match with what he is doing below. This man who is never getting tired of having sex with him is moving his hips slowly while resting his big hands on Dunk's waist, holding him in his place. Their cocks start to rub against each other.

"I have a plan." He starts talking again after nearly five minutes silent and Dunk almost gets carried away with how good their cocks are touching there. He can easily get wet again in any minute if Joong and his naughty hands and hip don't stop doing their things.

"H..uh?" Dunk focuses his eyes on his boyfriend again.

There is a hint of teasing in Joong's eyes and Dunk knows exactly what he is doing and thinking right now. "Can you get near me? I want to whisper my plan on you. You know my parents are working in the technology industry, I'm afraid they put tapper in this room."

Dunk rolls his eyes. "And they will be hearing their son's sex tape."

Joong laughs but his hand makes Dunk come so close to him until their chests are already touching each other. Dunk waits for him to whisper something, his plan, but no words come from his mouth. The older one wants to move away but his mate suddenly blows air into his ears then the next thing, almost makes his heart stop beating. This damned alpha licks on his ears in a very teasing manner and everything on Dunk's body starts to feel the heat again.

Not only on his stomach.

Dunk knows he will no longer ask about his previous question because once again, he lost on his boyfriend's game. But to his surprise, Joong says something about his plan while Dunk moves his hip fast on Joong's laps, still with the same position like fifteen minutes ago when they started their plaything. Dunk almost reaches his own release, he doesn't even remember anything about his question.

"Wh..at.. Are.. you.. say-AH!" Dunk definitely can't focus on Joong's words when Joong's is buried deep inside him while touching his most pleasuring spot.

"I say..." He is back to his ear again, whispering his words while licking and biting Dunk's ears.

Nothing comes to his mind, Dunk can't hear that at all.

He just hopes tomorrow Joong will explain that one more time.

Preferably with both of them wearing full clothes and not in bed.

***

A half hour ago, Phuwin had a call from Dunk's mother. She was asking Phuwin to join her to drink her tea in her hotel room. Phuwin didn't want to come at first, but after thinking that he might have some information that can help Joong and Dunk's escaping mission, he chose to come.

When he enters the room, he is shocked to see that not only Dunk's mother is in this room but also Joong's mother.

Oh my...

"Don't get too scared, we won't pull each other's hair in front of you."

Phuwin smiles awkwardly and walks closer to sit on the sofa with them. He looks at the mothers' appearance and acknowledges their different taste of style. While Dunk's mother is more glamorous and fancy, everyone will know that she works in the fashion industry, Joong's mother is more casual but smart look. She looks way younger than Dunk's mother from the way she styled herself, even though Phuwin learnt before that Dunk's mother was only 2 years older than Joong's mother.

"Did Joong or Dunk contact you and your boyfriend?" This time, Joong's mother is the one who asks him a question. This is the first time she talks directly to him. She is way quieter than Dunk's mother. But both of their auras are intimidating, Pond is afraid of Dunk's mother but for Phuwin he's more afraid of Joong's.

"No."

She nods and the woman besides him sips her earl gray tea.

"They really can make us reunite again." She says that to another woman in this room but there is no response from the other side. Phuwin really wonders what was happening in these two families.

Why do they look like they know each other for so long?

Phuwin can't help but get curious and if he gets curious, he needs to have the answer.

"I know this may be a presumptuous question, but can I know what is happening here? I know I played my part in their disappearance right now, but Joong and Dunk are both grown up adults. Why do both of the families work this hard to find them as if they are ten year old kids who are missing?"

Phuwin doesn't know what is wrong in his question but the women in front of him look more stiff after his question, especially the last part question.

Dunk's mother laughs a little, more like mocking something Phuwin doesn't know what it is. "We've been here before, sipping our tea together, trying to calm down, when in the inside there was a whole holocaust happening because of the disappearance of our children." She looks at Joong's mother. "Feel familiar, yeah?"

Joong's mother doesn't react to anything, she only throws her gaze over the sky outside the big glass window.

"It must have confused you so much, Phuwin."

Yes, it is fucking confusing, what is happening in these families!

The way she (Dunk's mother) asked him about Dunk who went to Germany because of Phuwin's lie was like interrogating a criminal's accomplice. Phuwin acknowledged that he was wrong with that lie but he was so frustrated himself. Then all of sudden he was dragged to this unfamiliar country to search for Joong and Dunk. Thank God Pond is still in this country. But right now they are both locked in the same hotel room with these two big families, as if they are their hostage.

"But you weren't completely wrong with your question before." Dunk's mother gives him a piece of old newspaper and the title makes Phuwin's eyes get bigger in shock. "Now you know which part of your question was true."

Phuwin walks back to his hotel room with so many things going on in his mind. Dunk's mother told him everything in front of Joong's mother as if she wanted to make it clear that everything from their past was Joong's fault, he was wrong to just exist and came into her twin children's life. And to make it more painful, Joong's mother didn't really stand up for his own son.

He feels bad for Joong but he also feels bad for Dunk. How could he encounter that kind of choice at such a young age? He needed to choose between his twin's brother or... who was Joong for him at that moment? But seeing adult them, Phuwin is sure that Joong and Dunk are each other's soulmate.

But his logical thinking is also saying that it's hard for both of the parents to accept their relationship. Because one kid was sacrificed so the other two can have their life. But it was never Joong and Dunk's fault, they were also victims of this tragedy, even they had it harder than Dao because they are still breathing in this world and taking all the blame and hate they got from their own parents.

They are suffering enough.

But the parents also have it hard, especially Dunk's parents. Maybe for Dunk's mother, it is already hard to see Dunk. Because whenever she sees Dunk, she will automatically remember her deceased son. Right now, she must face both Joong and Dunk being together. The two kids that were surviving with a scarification of her oldest son. Phuwin can imagine the amount of hatred she has right now for this turn of event. It feels like they are rubbing salt to her everlasting wound.

Now he understands why Dunk's parents are so overprotective and over-controlling his life. But the point he still doesn't understand is why Joong's parents are still abandoning him like that even though they almost lost him in the past? Is Joong really their unwanted kid? Are they not really having some affection for their own blood and flesh?

It's a very hard condition.

Can Joong and Dunk really be happy together without sacrificing their own parents' peace of mind and happiness?

Phuwin opens the door of his and Pond's hotel room and sees his boyfriend sit restlessly on their bed. Pond throws his gaze at him instantly when he notices that someone is in the room with him. "Where did you go so long?"

Phuwin wants to explain everything he knows to Pond about Joong and Dunk's past but something on his alpha's face tells him that he needs to ask first what it is that Pond knows. He looks so restless right now and he is sure it's not completely because Phuwin was missing from his side.

"What is it?" Phuwin asks directly.

"Joong texted me, he said that i need to tell both of their parents that they are coming back to Thailand this evening."

"What?" Phuwin is shocked by the news.

"They will wait for their parents in their own home."

Phuwin heard a lot of shocking things today but this is definitely the one that shocks him the most. Seeing Joong and Dunk's attachment toward each other, he didn't expect them to give up this easily.

Both him and Pond thought that they would go as far as they could until one day their family found them. It's only day three after their parents landed in this country to search for them. Their escape was too short, even for someone like Phuwin.

This makes him wonder.

Are they really giving up on being together this easy?

To be continued

***

Hi Hi! How have you been my dear readers? The new chapter is here to start your new week. How was it? Kindly give me some of your thoughts about this chapter on the comments section, hehehe is it only me but why i feel this chapter is shorter? lol it has more than 5.4k words tho

Oh yea... I got so many birthday greetings and wishes in the previous chapter, i want to say thank you very much! i hope we are all can have a great year ahead! It will be greater if there is joongdunk new BL series on GMMTV2024 Part2 hahahaha

We already on the chapter 18, the end is nearing faster than i thought it can be. thank you for following this story this far, i'm so happy to see there is over 18k views/hits on wattpad and AO3 combined for this story (by the time i post this chapter). really didn't expect this story will have this much readers when i first started writing this. THANK YOU VERY MUCH, khob khun ka, arigato, gomawoyo.

SEE YOU NEXT CHAPTER!

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