The day before Casper's first birthday, Harry was awake before the sun came up.

"This is it," he whispered to Draco, who was flat on his back beside him, blankly staring at the ceiling. "The hardest day."

"It's gonna get a lot harder than this," said Draco grimly, but it was clear he was dreading it too.

Wordlessly, Harry got up from the bed and grabbed two robes. He passed one to Draco, and the two of them padded out of the Gryffindor dorm and down the stairs to the nursery. Inside, Casper was sleeping, and they watched him in silence for what seemed like a very long time.

Harry became aware that he was crying softly; a small tilt of his head confirmed that Draco was too. He slipped his hand into the other boy's, and then they couldn't take it any longer and scooped their baby up together from his crib.

"Back to bed?" Draco asked, his voice cracking. Harry nodded. He hoped it wasn't for the last time.

The pair of them had hardly slept for nights on end since receiving the latest letter from Narcissa, completely torn over what to do.

At first, they'd taken conflicting sides; it had caused some ferocious arguments between them.

"She said she'll do better with Cas than she did with you," Harry had insisted one night. "It's got to be better than trying to hide him through an actual war, Draco. And besides, people deserve second chances."

"Maybe they do, but not with our baby, you lunatic! She fucked me up once, isn't that enough for her?" Draco cried. "He's not my mother's shot at forgiveness, or the symbol of the son she shouldn't have ruined, he's a human being!"

After that, the plan had been to smuggle Casper to Molly Weasley, though they'd soon found out that she was preparing to fight: there was no room for a baby under her war paint. Besides, didn't she have enough children to worry about, without adding an eighth?

It was Hermione who had made the decision in the end. "What would Lily do, Harry?" she'd asked quietly in the Common Room one night, her face illuminated by the fire.

"She'd do anything," Harry whispered.

He eyed his son on the floor, who was struggling to pull himself up to a standing position with Draco's help, and laughing gleefully at himself when he fell.

And, just like that, Harry and Draco knew what they had to do.

***

After relaying their intentions to Dumbledore, Draco's eventual reply to his mother had been curt, but to the point.

6th April 1997

Meet us at 10 tomorrow night at Hogwarts' gates. Bring nobody.
Draco

They'd drawn up a list of Oaths too on Draco's nicest parchment, enough to keep Narcissa busy.

"You alright, Harry?" Draco asked quietly as the two of them lay back down in bed, Casper still asleep between them.

Harry could hear his heart audibly break.

"We're going to miss his birthday," he whispered, tears dripping down his face. "This wasn't how it was supposed to go."

Draco felt his own heart wrench too, but he forced himself to look stronger for Harry. He pushed his love's dark hair back from his forehead, which was burning up.

"What better gift could we give him than safety?" he asked tenderly.

They couldn't bring themselves to leave the bed once the day began, and didn't bother to head to any of their classes or even for dinner. It was the last day of the Spring term; they'd not be missed too much.

When they needed to get water, or a snack, or go to the toilet, Cas came with them; sometimes wobbling unsteadily on his feet and clutching each of his fathers' hands, sometimes carried. Either way, they couldn't bear to leave him.

And then 10pm rolled around like a boulder, and it was time to leave.

Casper's bags were packed, he was fast asleep. Harry and Draco had prepared as many bottles and pots of puréed baby food as they could manage with food from the kitchen, they were all set.

"This is the really sad part," Harry whispered, staring up at Draco in anguish. "I don't want to do it any more. Don't make me give him away."

"I'm not making you, Harry," Draco reminded him in as soft a tone as he could manage. He was crying again; he'd been crying all day. "I'm just doing it with you. We know we have to do this."

Harry couldn't even form the words to argue with that, such was the anguish that clouded his mind. His baby son, being given to the woman who had permitted Draco's childhood abuse, who'd wanted to kill him over the summer, who'd married a Death Eater.

"What the fuck is my life?" he asked out loud. "We're sixteen years old, we shouldn't have to make decisions like this."

"I know, darling. I know." Draco leaned in and kissed his closed eyelids, trying to soak as much comfort into Harry as he could with just a kiss.

"I'm a fucking child."

"I know, darling."

There were no more words to be said after that, and the boys made their way exhaustedly down to the gates of Hogwarts, under the cover of Harry's Invisibility Cloak.

Casper didn't stir once as they walked, not even when they got outside into the cold April night air, and both his parents were grateful for this. They were crying enough for the three of them and they both knew seeing his inquisitive little face would break them even further.

Narcissa was waiting anxiously at the gates when they arrived, and sighed with relief as they revealed themselves.

"Draco, Harry!" she exclaimed. "I thought you wouldn't show."

"We decided to do the right thing," said Draco stiffly.

She nodded, knowing better than to say anything more.

"Shall we do the Vow?" Harry asked, hating himself for doing anything to further the process, but unable to stand inactive for any longer. He shifted Casper into just one arm, and pulled out his wand with the other.

Draco and Narcissa turned to face each other, linking their hands awkwardly. They clearly hadn't made this much contact in a long time, if ever.

Harry placed the tip of his wand between them, and began to speak.

"Do you, Narcissa Malfoy, swear to protect our son, Casper James Altair Potter, with your life, caring for him to the best of your ability at all times, and forsaking everything else in favour of his needs?" he asked.

Narcissa nodded. "I swear."

A red curl of flame licked out of the wand and draped itself around the hands, binding them together.

Harry continued. "Do you swear to conceal his whereabouts and his entire existence from the Dark Lord and Lucius Malfoy, and anyone who considers themselves an ally to the Death Eaters?"

"I swear."

Another crimson tongue spiralled over their skin. Draco watched in fascination,
trying not to cry over the bond.

"Do you swear to rescind every offer of aid you have ever made to the Dark Lord and to Lucius Malfoy as long as Casper is in your care, and to prevail on the side of what is morally right - and, if there is to be a war, do you swear to keep our baby right away from it until the violence is over, no matter what?"

"I swear."

"If Draco and I are to die in whatever comes next, do you swear you will care for our son for the rest of his life, to the best of your human ability?"

"I swear."

"Then it's done."

Draco released his mother's hand slowly, and turned to Harry. "Let's get this over with, sweetheart," he whispered.

He pulled Casper gently from Harry's arm, careful not to wake him, and gave him a light kiss on his head.

It looked just the same as if he was kissing his baby goodnight again, rather than possibly saying goodbye forever, and something inside Draco began to hurt.

Harry leaned in to kiss him too, and then Draco passed the sleeping baby to his mother.

"No," Harry whispered, but he didn't move. He was rooted to the ground in worry and pain; every nerve in his body was screaming at him not to let this happen - but I have to, he thought with a whimper.

"I love you, Draco," said Narcissa steadily to her son as she accepted his child. Her eyes didn't leave his, this was no half-hearted statement and she made no apology about it.

"Do you?" Draco asked coolly.

"Very much."

He looked her up and down, unsure whether the statement made him want to sob or just slap her.

"Let's hope you do a better job of showing it to my son, then," he said eventually, and then turned on his heel, pulling Harry away with him.

"Don't watch her take him away," he said quietly, and Harry didn't fight him.

***

Two hours later, it was midnight. The 8th of April 1997.

"Happy first birthday, Cassy," Draco whispered to the ceiling when the clock chimed 12. Harry was finally asleep beside him, having cried himself practically sick for an hour and a half and then passed out with exhaustion.

"Fuck, I hope we've done the right thing."

________________________________

a/n: thanks for reading🤍

i found this one quite hard to write, not sure why, but i mean they've done it now!

have they done the right thing? that's the big question!

~ paradisedraco